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Greatest Rock n’ Roll Physiques in History

Greatest Rock n’ Roll Physiques in History

An Alternative Fitness Compilation of the Greatest Rock n’ Roll Physiques in History

How many utterly wretched Rock N’ Roll songs have been written about ‘The Road’ and the struggles of touring…Undoubtedly, this number far surpasses how many people that can name the current Mr. Olympia. An existence of playing the bars in bum-fuck-Dakota, living as a minimalist (simply because you can’t afford to buy anything) and trying to maintain a healthy, functional and attractive body can be a colossal task. More than a hand-full have pulled off this impressive achievement, and few less displaying world class physiques.


-PART 1-


Henry Rollins_Bodybuilding

Henry Rollins – His unforgettable prose ‘The Iron’ remains at the tip of the many veteran lifters tongues and continues to inspire newcomers to the many facets of the weight lifting subculture. Early Rollins – (Black Flag era) was very stringy, not much to come by for mass but practical, no need to carry too much lumbering mass in case a violent confrontation with the LAPD was imminent. In the 90’s, Rollin’s reached the height of his commercial success with the hit ‘Liar’; this also the time period his physique packed the best combination of beef and aesthetics. Also presenting a powerful, bludgeoning message he displayed a physique that conveyed pure, rigid animosity.


Iggy Pop_Bodybuilding_Old-Young

Iggy Pop – The ‘Grand Daddy’ of them all receives much respect for consistency, displaying pretty much the same physique for the last 40 years. Very little mass to speak of— Undoubtedly the result of a heroin and peanut-butter diet. Once penning the now almost biblical lyrics ‘Street Walkin’ Cheetah with a handful of Napalm’ in ‘Search and Destroy’; seems oddly fitting for his build as well. His muscles are sleek, ready to pounce at any time, known for his manic performances. Take note—running around the stage like a rock n’ roll berserker does wonders for burning body fat!


Kane Roberts_Bodybuilding

Kane Roberts  What kind of creation ensues when one mixes the copious amounts of aqua net hair-spray, customized machine gun guitars (apt for SICK SHREDDING), anabolic steroids, and heavy metal?— Motherfuckin’ Kane Roberts, son. The former guitar player for Alice Cooper displayed the most actual ‘bodybuilder’ type of physique among the lineup presented, along with Doyle Von Wolfenstein. With androgenic deltoids, massive pythons, gladiator pectorals and his axe—Kane Roberts surely soiled the panties of thousands of young heavy metal maidens. Arguably during the time period he was so adored by them he could pull some sort of reverse praying mantis— The male eating the head of the female after copulation – even with the female knowing what is in store. A physique that was simply too badass for the casual head banger to fully appreciate.


James Stickman – (Fury of Five, Boxcutter) Fury of Five were a criminally (quite literally) underrated hardcore band from New Jersey that would become famous for their heavy monster sound, accompanied with bludgeoning beat-downs delivered by the ‘always read to throw down’ James Stikman. Although covered by a layer of ink, one quick viewing of their video ‘Do or Die’, makes Stikman appear as other-worldly behemoth, easily eating the nearest White Power skinhead in a 50 mile radius. Stikman was a legitimate ‘tough guy’, taking on all challengers—welcoming being outnumbered in open street warfare. Eventually he’d land a brief stint in prison, further- sedimenting his legendary ‘outlaw’ image on the East Cost image. In his prime he was over 263 pounds, with dreadlocks, and could ‘ninja dance’ with the best of them. 


Glenn Danzig_Bodybuilding

Glenn Danzig – Let’s forget about that fat nobody that gained his only claim of notoriety by knocking out the King of Evil. Instead—we travel in a time capsule back to the mid 90’s when MTV still played music—‘Mother’ is on heavy rotation and Danzig appears to be a giant, muscular warlock singing incredibly catchy blues-infused ‘metal’/hardrock/punk. In reality, he stands close in height to Lee Priest—another outlaw. His muscular physique seemed to emphasize his ‘evil’ persona.


 To  Be Continued…

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